Brief Update

Breaking news: Gender Blank is alive! I know you were all worried. 'Cause it's been, like, a year and a half since I've posted anything. What can I say? I've been busy.

Anyway, GB and the missus are on the move. We're currently sitting in the living room among about a bazillion boxes, watching softball, and avoiding more packing. But in a few short weeks, we will be moving to Massachusetts, where we'll be living by the ocean and getting hitched for realz. Monkey Pants is leaving her post as a college professor to find a better quality of life, which at this point includes a traveling hot dog stand on Cape Cod. We'll see how that all works out.

So there you go. Maybe this move will be good for my blogging, too. Or maybe it will be another year and a half. One just never knows.

In the meantime, go Huskies!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Just wanted to wish all of you a belated but very happy Thanksgiving! We had some wonderful friends visit us for the holiday, and it was so good to connect with our "comfortable people." You know those people who just get you? And with whom you can put away your filter and just be your own true self? And play Apples to Apples for hours and laugh hysterically while playing bad ping pong? Those people. We are so thankful for them. It was awesome, and we were sad when they drove away.

But at least we have pictures of funny birds from a local cider mill to remind us of the visit.



What the hell is this?



And these?



This one's name is Elvis.



And these are geese in couture.

Prop 8: The Musical

Look at all the fabulous queer-friendly folks in this video from funnyordie.com!

I fucking love Tina Fey. And Amy Poehler.

Need a cup of Coffey

I just can't help myself. I am always (always!) attracted to bitchy women. But bitchy-strong, not bitchy-whiny. And if they look a little freaky or untraditional, even better.

So it is with my new crush, Tabatha Coffey, former contenstant on Bravo's Shear Genius. She's got a new show on Bravo this season: Tabatha's Salon Takeover. She's kinda bitchy, but she's got a gooey center in there somewhere. I just know it.

Rowrrr.

Just the kind of nerd I am

h/t to Bob

Two letters to Barack Obama

Here's the letter I wanted to write to Barack Obama tonight:

Dear Barack Obama,

Quit being such a douchebag, please. I understand from your past and recent actions that you don't give two shits about queer people or women, so I don't imagine that a plea from this queer woman will mean much to you. However, I imagine that by now you've even started to alienate voters you actually care about (straight males, mostly the white ones), so I thought I'd just make this friendly request on behalf of your...I don't know...integrity, I guess. You were supposed to be the Great New Hope, but you're quickly becoming indistinguishable from that pile of shit that resembles McCain. Pretty sure that's not what you promised a few months ago, although I'll have to go back and study your transcripts. You're a shifty motherfucker, so I may have missed it.

Anyway, I don't expect you to stop being a douchebag just for me. I mean, I didn't even vote for you in the primary like I said I would, so I know I ain't done nothin' for you lately. But you seem to have endeared yourself to other progressives, and they're gonna start to get pissed, what with all the shitting all over their values and stuff, so maybe you could do it for them. Or for yourself, really, since you're gonna need their votes to get that white house. Or maybe you could do it because you promised us you were different, that you were a decent guy who cared about all the people society just doesn't care about (wait, that was Edwards, wasn't it?). Anyway, I know for a fact you promised us you were different, and I'm pretty sure you at least strongly implied that you were a decent guy. But if you don't quit being such a colossal douchebag, well, then you're not a decent guy at all - you're just another fucking politician.

And all the shit you've been doing the last couple weeks makes me want to cut your nuts off.

Straighten up or fuck off,
Gender Blank

But because I am a civilized and mature adult, here is the comment I actually left on his website:

I am a registered Democrat who will be voting for Cynthia McKinney in November because Barack Obama has proven over the last several weeks that he doesn't care at all about women (comments on abortion, telling Bernie Mac he was just "messing with him" after pretending to chastise him for his misogynist remarks) or pretty much anything else his most vocal supporters care about (FISA, Iraq pullout, pandering to evangelicals, gun control). At this point Barack Obama and John McCain might as well be the same candidate.

Barack Obama is supposedly a great orator, so I don't believe all of these things are simply instances of him "misspeaking." He is either misspeaking (in which case I just can't trust anything he actually says), or he means what he is saying (in which case I simply can't trust him). Either way he loses my vote.

Barack Obama is behaving like a political opportunist with no integrity. He promised something very different from what he has delivered thus far. I refuse to hold my nose and vote for him just because he's the Democratic nominee. I will instead gladly cast my vote for a Green.

If John McCain wins the election because enough true progressives are fed up with Obama's crap and vote for Cynthia McKinney or some other candidate, it will not be our fault. It will be Obama's fault for treating us like our votes are expendable. In any case, at this point it doesn't seem like McCain will be much more horrible for the country than Obama's recent actions suggest he will be.

Sincerely,

Gender Blank

I kinda wish I'd actually written the first one.